The sun is shining. Its that kind of weather that force you to smile. SMILE OR I SHOOT YOU DOWN, FOR FUCK SAKE!
No, I shouldn't be so cynical and bitter. I like suny winterdays.. It's just that.. "The feeling" is back. The feeling that say: "Go, go far away, you can't stay here anymore. Fly, fly far away, you can't get it here no more" and so on like a perpetual motion machine. The problem is that I know, that even if I got a ticket to Glasgow, London, Prague or even Calcutta today, it wouldn't change anything. My pondering would probibly stop for a while, but then , it would come back. Or... No.. I don't know...
It's just that I really feel that it could be good for me to get some space for a while. I need some new air... a new point of wiev of reality, from other things than studies ( even if my classes are very interesting and give me a lot of new perspectives). It doesent mather anyway. I can't afford a ticket anywere right now, if I don't give up being social and stop eating. *laughing cynical*. But I might take a cheap trainticket to Stockholm later this spring. To wisit my Angel, C and miss M. Well.. Time will give me.. strength... moahaha.
Sorry dear friends. Take care, and don't do anthing stupid that I shouldn't do.. . With other words. Follow your heart... do anything!
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